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The Complete Works of The Two Towers (Abridged)

One extremely funny parody of "The Two Towers". An excerpt:

EN ROUTE TO HELM'S DEEP

LEGOLAS: Wargs!

LEGOLAS and other warriors start slinging arrows and jumping onto horses.

GIMLI: What was that God-awful noise?

LEGOLAS: I'm guessing...wargs dying.

ARAGORN: Actually, it was Legolas's fangirl contingent, shrieking in delight at his horseback-riding tricks.

GIMLI: Ugh, that's sickening. Ooh, Aragorn, watch out! Cliff!

ARAGORN falls off cliff.

LEGOLAS: No! This is unbearable! I almost had ANOTHER facial expression!

You must read the whole thing. Very funny. Link via Asymmetrical Information.

Comments

Actually, I have decided, after seeing a documentary on The Two Towers, that Legolas is hot. Orlando Bloom, sans wig and costume, is just another skinny British kid. With really bad taste in haircuts and facial hair.

Sigh.

I saw the same one. After that, I understood the fuss about Figwit, who really is hot in real life. But Orlando has much to do to fix his silly little nothing of a beard.

It's amazing what long blond hair and pointy ears can do.